Wednesday, 23 February 2011

Struggling On


I should have stopped really. I'm not sure what made me continue; pride? Stupidity? Probably a bit of both! Maybe it was the fact that no matter how often I analyse and look back on my trades, the same thing just keeps screaming back at me, full volume - YOU WOULD BE IN PROFIT IF YOU JUST STUCK TO YOUR STRATEGY!!! And it's true. That's what drives me to start over each day. I would've given up long ago if I didn't analyse my trades. I used to do the same when I bet on the football but this gave me the opposite results. I realised that the months when I came out with huge profit were actually no different to the months where I lost heavily. It was just a couple of results either way that made the difference. But with the tennis, I would have been in profit EVERY SINGLE DAY since I started this blog. That's both a brilliant and a sickening statistic at the same time. I would have had losses still but the greens would have glossed over them. Yesterday, for example, I worked out the following (approx amounts, rounded up) would have happened if I'd stuck to my strategy:

Golubev v Mayer +15

Davydenko v Berdych +20

Schiavone v Peng +40

Hantuchova v Dushevina £0

Jankovic v Mirza +£25

Lopez v Djokovic +30

Pennetta v Safarova £0

Cibulkova v Zvonareva +20



That was £150 profit BEFORE I'D EVEN PLAYED THE EVENING GAMES! There was no point where I would've lost because all my losses were due to things that were not part of my strategy. I backed Cibulkova on serve - I never do this with WTA! I WAS actually £40 green on the Schiavone game but went back in for more - I never go back in when I've made that much! I would not have lost the Pennetta game because I would never even have traded it as part of my strategy.

So I marched onwards into the evening and after a shaky start, I was back in the green again. Always good to finish the day in a positive light. I am now more determined than ever to keep going. During the Dodig game, I fought hard to batten down my anger as I made an early mistake. It was the first time I've ever managed to keep it bottled up, remain calm and knock down the amount of red. It was a very strange feeling. I could feel the frustration pulsing within my chest, like volcanic lava about to spew out into the wilderness. I had to literally force the scowl off my face and take a few deep breaths to suppress it. It worked. No banging of my chair, no smacking of my forehead, no crying out to the heavens, just some lip-biting.

I realise this makes me seem like I need anger management classes but if you met me, you would be surprised at how placid I am. I have never had a full blown argument with anyone in my entire life! I've only been involved in a fight once and that was when a kid at school was picking on me. I don't even recall ever shouting at anyone. But trading brings out a side of me that frankly, even I am frightened of! Anyway, with losses for the day trimmed down, I decided to soldier on with the last few remaining pounds for another day...........

2 comments:

  1. pleased to hear that you are getting in control , i think this maybe your turning point , maybe you have your daily targets set to high , as i wish i new your strat as £30 a day for me would be perfect , good luck and stick to what you know works and rebuild your bank , im no expert , but im sure you will be firing on all cylinders shortly
    roger

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  2. Cheers Roger, I don't have daily or weekly targets as in the past they have lead to me chasing towards the end of the day and putting too much pressure on. I have an idea of what I'd like per month but my aim is always to remain neutral with my expectations from day to day - some will be good, some will be bad but putting time limits on things does not work for me personally.

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