Tuesday, 15 March 2011
Dinara no Dinero
I hate Dinara Safina. She epitomises everything I dislike about tennis players. She never smiles even after winning a point, plays with zero subtlety, smashes every ball as hard as she can regardless of the situation, consistently moans at ball-kids and throws tantrums, grunts and screams loudly on every shot, makes the game difficult to watch and acts as if she thoroughly hates playing. I now have even more reason to hate her - she ruined my entire day.
I felt much better today and was really up for a good session. It started brilliantly and I had a nice early platform to build confidence from. But I did something inexplicably stupid on the Rezai v Sharapova game. I had £17 profit on half-stakes and I should have been happy with that. I'd have been £75 up for the day. But I got greedy and backed in at low odds. You can guess the rest. I was fuming, even more so when I looked at my paper-trades and saw I was in much healthier profit than my actual trades. So I placed a 'new strategy' trade next, on the Del Potro v Dolgopolov game............again, you don't need me to say what happened. Sod's law isn't it? My paper-trades produced 7 wins and 1 small loss today. The only real-money trade was a loser.
Fortunately, it wasn't a huge blow and I continued onwards, settling down and not losing my head. That was until the final trade of the day. It was going to be a loss anyway but somehow, I managed to turn it into a disaster which wiped out a full day's work. I tried to limit my losses by backing Stosur but accidentally LAYED Stosur instead. I tried to quickly reverse the position but it was too late. The damage was done and the best I could do was go all red - £40 on Stosur, £90 on Safina. I mentioned just a day or two ago about how losses feel 10 times worse when they occur in the wee hours. Well I was staring at a red figure for the day at 4am - I was demoralised. Even more so when I saw my paper-trade results - PLUS £130!!!
I know it's just a small loss for today but I feel sick. I'm really fed up at how just one lapse in concentration, one tiny mistake, one moment of madness, can cost me so much. The new system I'm working on would not leave me in such a position. It relies less on me having to trade out at exact points, requires a smaller stake to produce similar greens and overall, suits my personality much better. I can be a bit more laid back and let trades run and just watch the tennis unfold. I actually think it can be added to my other strategies and used alongside but there could also be some conflict, where it's either one or the other. This is not a fun position to be in! Plus, we all know what will happen as soon as I switch to the new system. The Gambler's Law dictates that my paper-traded 11 wins and 4 losses will reverse to 4 wins and 11 losses!
So I'm going to think long and hard about how to trade tomorrow. With the Dinara dinero in tact, I would have still been plus £50 for the day and only using half-stakes. But it isn't in tact. And the blood, sweat and tears to get the profit was yet another stressful rollercoaster ride. Maybe I need to admit that I am not suited to this style of trading and maybe never will be able to get that mindset consistently strong enough. Honestly, if you put someone with enough patience and discipline with my current system, they would be laughing all the way to the bank. Time for a change?