Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Frustration

It's amazing how when you put a spotlight on your emotions, you notice so much more about the way that you think and act. My plan to talk to myself more has already revealed a lot about my mental state when I trade. I didn't realise quite how easily frustrated I am. I thought it only surfaced when I made a major error but in fact, frustration is always right on the brink, ready to explode with the most minor of incidents. I really had to work hard to keep a lid on my emotions on Monday and almost every game produced a moment where anger or frustration threatened to boil over. I didn't even have a bad day, in fact, I ended in profit for the 7th day running. On Tuesday, that run ended.




It's been a while since I have shown a losing day's P&L but I think this one will benefit me. I started fine and was very unlucky not to go all-green on the Pavlyuchenkova and Zvonareva games. But immediately, the fact I missed out on two wins by just a point or two, got me worked-up. Of the following 10 games, I tried to force a win on 9 of them, getting more and more frustrated as each match went by. You can see how the last 2 games have the biggest losses and that is no coincidence. By that time, I was completely pissed off. It was one of those days where opportunities were thin on the ground and when they did arise, I missed them because I was too busy getting involved in games I should have just left. No matter what I did, it wouldn't come off. Looking back on each individual game, here is what I would have made if I'd done the right things:


Pavlyuchenkova v Martinez-Sanchez -£12

Zvonareva v Zakopalova -£5

Stosur v Kirilenko +£30

Berdych v Melzer -£6

Suarrez-Navarro v Petkovic +£20

Haase v Giraldo -£4


All the other games, I should not have even placed a trade at all. So I would've been +£23 for the day - not bad considering how few opportunities arose.

So it's going to take a lot more than I first thought to sort out this deep-seated level of frustration. It all stems from that old bug-bear 'impatience' and also my own shortfall of being a perfectionist. But it can be worked on and I'll continue to better myself until the day comes when I can accept a mistake or a loss. Talking went out the window as the day went on but at the start I was fine and over the last two days, it has proved to be a very effective tool. I need to keep it up through the tough times. Most days will not be this difficult, so I have to learn that if I stay calm and do the right things, I can even make money on a bad day like today.

6 comments:

  1. OK you lost, what is impressive is that you seem to have gotten out at a max of £20 loss per market, that shows discipline and maturity.

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  2. Depends how you look at it AG! I did keep the reds to small amount compared to what they've been in the past but if I'd shown true discipline, I would not have entered most of those games in the first place.

    The positive thing is that the strategy would still produce results even on a bad day, if I use it properly. I have to show better mental maturity for that to happen!

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  3. Listen mate, we all go through these times (Some of us, me!) more than others.

    You know what you are doing, that much is obvious. It is however really refreshing to see someone document the lows rather than the highs.

    I, for one, am looking forward to you turning this around and coming out the other side.

    Good Luck and stay Positive. In a couple of months you'll look back at this and laugh.

    SP

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  4. Cheers SP, really appreciate your comments. I've had a rough time since I started this blog but despite the setbacks, I am definitely progressing - just not as fast as I'd hoped!

    The difference between me from when I started to now is massive and I believe it's just a matter of time till I come out the other side, as you say.

    Thanks again.

    Sultan

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  5. I second what Punter says, fantastic blog for sharing both highs/low and in such an excellent articulate way. This is the first blog I've ever follow, but its not because I'm new to the net (heavy user since early 90's!), just that none have ever interested me before.

    I rarely tell people what it is I do for the simple fact that most will simple conclude I have a gambling problem (sure many of you will know the drill), but when I do and they are keen to learn more and what it in tails, I will be sending them here to learn about what we go through on a daily basis.

    Keep plugging away Sultan, thanks for sharing and may you continue to do so. Good luck with AR&R!

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  6. Thanks Jackhulk and good luck to you too. AR&R now well underway and so far, so good. Now just need some more green..............

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